Why do job seekers insist on complaining about or fighting things they’ve no control over?
The most successful people I know tend to go with the flow. This observation illustrates the power of adaptability and acceptance. A person who masters ‘going with the flow’ is better equipped to handle life’s ebbs and flows with ease and calmness. They don’t get emotionally bogged down by setbacks or try to control outcomes. Instead, they approach challenges with an open mind and are willing to consider alternative approaches. They don’t waste their energy on what they can’t change—it is what it is.
When you go with the flow, your job search moves with you. When an application doesn’t lead to an interview, you don’t dwell on it; you accept that there are job seekers out there who are more qualified than you, and you move on. Adopting a “F*ck it!” mentality throughout your job search is the best thing you can do for your mental well-being. When you go with the flow, you allow things to happen, such as ‘it wasn’t meant to be,’ and unfold naturally, as they are meant to, resulting in much better results.
Employers own their hiring process. Job seekers aren’t in a position to change an employer’s:
- Requirements and qualifications
- Hiring timeline
- Interview format and questions the hiring manager chooses to ask
- Compensation range and benefits package
- Decision-making process used to assess and select candidates
- Level of communication and feedback provided, if any
Many job seekers tell me they’re frustrated and burned out by their job search. They apply to dozens of jobs a week, relentlessly network, and constantly update their LinkedIn profile and resume. When interviews and offers don’t materialize, they intensify their efforts, increasing their exhaustion and discouragement.
While counterintuitive, my response is: “What if the answer to improving your job search results is doing less, focusing less?” Focus on quality (key) applications and networking rather than trying to cover many bases—quality over quantity.
The key to a less frustrating and more successful job search is to let go of trying to control, or wishing you could, how employers hire, which is beyond your control. This acceptance can bring a sense of relief, freeing up mental and emotional bandwidth for a more productive job search.
Steps you can take to go with the flow:
Stop applying to every job posting you see.
It’s easy to get caught up in the angst-ridden mindset you should apply to as many jobs as possible. The truth is the spray-and-pray approach, which has become all too easy with template emailing, applying online, and using AI bots to fill out applications (e.g., LazyApply), is unlikely to be effective. Instead, apply for roles selectively. Focus on employers and jobs aligning with your skills, experience, and career goals, saving time and energy for suitable employers and jobs.
Let go of having the mythical “perfect” resume.
Self-proclaiming career coaches and resume writers want you to believe there’s such a thing as a “perfect” resume. While resumes still play a role in job searching, they are becoming less relevant as the digital age advances. If you need to stress over something, stress over your LinkedIn profile. Your LinkedIn profile has much more visibility and reach than your resume, which is only read by those you forward it to.
Stop agonizing over your resume and tweaking it endlessly. The perfect resume doesn’t exist. Create the best result-oriented (key) resume you can and be done with it. Your resume doesn’t have to be flawless; you only need to show what results you can produce.
Don’t stress about the interview process.
Interviews are anxiety-inducing, so it’s natural to want to prepare extensively. Rather than scripting your responses to “potential” questions, be present and authentic. Bringing a relaxed attitude to your interviews and being ready to have an open conversation is a competitive advantage. This’ll make the interview less stressful on both sides of the desk, and your interviewer will feel more connected to you.
Embrace the unexpected.
Inevitably, your job search will have unpredictable twists and turns. You may get called in for an interview for a role you didn’t even apply for, or an old connection reaches out with a potential opportunity. Take advantage of these serendipitous opportunities. You never know where an unexpected opportunity might lead.
Trust the process.
Finding the right job and employer takes time. I firmly believe that when you stay patient and keep taking the right actions—networking, actively participating on LinkedIn, applying for relevant roles, researching companies you’d like to work for, and mentally preparing for interviews—you’ll eventually find the right opportunity. When you let go of the need to control your job search’s timeline, you’ll be less stressed and more productive.
The key is to shift away from trying to micromanage every aspect of your job search and instead embrace a more flexible, adaptable mindset. Rightfully, employers will do what they think is in their best interest; there’s nothing you can do about it, which is why you may as well free up mental and emotional bandwidth and go with the flow.
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Nick Kossovan, a well-seasoned veteran of the corporate landscape, offers “unsweetened” job search advice. You can send Nick your questions to artoffindingwork@gmail.com.