Making Life worth living despite the biggest Storm by Tess Cusipag
Holy Week makes you reflect on your past activities and all the storms that you encountered and how you survived.
In 2018, I published a story written by the late Carlos Padilla where we got sued by the late senator Tobias Enverga. On the process, Carlos Padilla and the other witness died, so I ended up taking the blunt in a summary judgement and was made to pay $436,000.00 to the Enverga family.
The case had a gag order not to discuss after and with my ignorance replied to reporters when they questioned me about it. So Another case was filed against me for violating the permanent injunction and was sent to the Women’s Correctional in Milton for 13 days.
It was a journey that I never imagined. I had a well-disciplined upbringing and going to jail even for a short time was never in my vision.
I remember my dear friends trying to control themselves from crying when the sentence was rendered, but at that point, I was revolting and asking my lawyer for my defense and why I was left in the dark about everything.
I can say that this was the most frightening experience as I did not know what was ahead. I was never an offender. I have never been convicted of anything in my 50 years here in Canada.
When I walked in, the ladies in the front that booked me were sympathetic and promised that my stay would be very short. “Only 13 days and you will be out,” she said “We promise to look after you well and then you will realize it is not really bad.” Those promises were on my mind, but I did not really know what they meant.
I met most of the women who were there for various reasons but not as criminals and were from good families and respectable backgrounds. From them alone, I realized I am not the only one that has to face this dilemma.
I looked at the small room and remember my late husband activist/editor and founder of Balita who was a political prisoner during the martial law regime because of his critical articles about the Marcos dictatorship.
Did he have the same size of the room, was he treated well? I have a single bed, a table, stool, mirror, and shelf.
I wondered if Ruben was allowed to mingle with the other inmates. I remember him telling me that he was with the same cell with Ninoy Aquino till Ninoy was transferred somewhere else.
I tried to forget that I am not at home, so I don’t get attacked by depression. I call my family whenever I get the chance.
During quiet moments, I look outside my window. I see the birds freely stopping and then flying away again, the cars on the freeway, the GO trains and my wish that I was on it going home to Markham. The green grass and I think of my own garden.
That is when real sadness creeps in. I remember the tears of my children upon learning of what happened to me and that I would not be able to come home for 13 days. Every drop of those tears will linger in my memory forever. My siblings and my relatives outside the country were so worried but all they could do was pray harder for me.
Impromptu support system
People here have learned to survive by looking after each other. The everyday conversation, the friendship they have developed. Some are real professionals in their outside lives.
Chatting with these women can be a learning experience, I learned where to ask help, who is the best lawyer for different cases. It really pleased me. I fought the inevitable, I got here because of contempt and not for a major crime.
Understanding punishment.
In this society, it is accepted that there are laws to obey, and ignorance is not an excuse. You can easily violate them if you are not careful, but we heard from one of the inmates. Accept, Fix and try not to make it happen again.”
This Center for women is not jail like what I envisioned. This is rehab where they try to straighten the lives of those that have gone astray. Some have vowed not to come back here ever. They are mothers, sisters, aunts and they are not criminals.
I consider this as one of my trips around the world where I met new friends. There was no sightseeing but the surroundings of the big building but a very meaningful experience.
It is like women’s dormitory with stricter rules, you are never locked inside your room, and you have the freedom to play cards, scrabbles, watch TV and other table games, or go to the gym for exercise on designated times. There are also movies on weekends.
The people I met here regardless of what they are here for, are good people with good heart. I would not know what to do if not for their help.
This is where I talked to a Filipina on another wing. She lives not very far from me in Markham. She gave me a rosary and it is from her that I learned about the Catholic service coming here every Wednesday nights.
She very well awakened me when she said: “Everything happens for a reason, and we will know later on why God gave this to us.”
Most of them will not be here for long, like me, they have families to take care. This place has taught us to be humble, the wisdom and the great lessons to keep forever
When I got out, I tried to forget the experience. Some friends were really with me and supported me and made my come back as if nothing bad had happened.
But the people who got me into it were not. I will never forget Rosemer Enverga during the Philippine Festival at Celebration Square in Mississauga.
I just got out of the Correctional that week and I was politely greeted by her husband. My reply am okay, nakawala na rin. Then the wife behind started screaming “OO NGA, HOY, NAKAWALA NA SI TESS, HOY, NAKAWALA NA SI TESS” shouting on top of her lungs.
I just looked at disbelief at what borrowed power has made her become.
Then it reminded me of spending thousands of dollars in a lawsuit that I should not have been, two of her pageant winners sued each other and because I know the defendant made a comment of assurance on FB.
The next thing I knew, I was already receiving a summon. The case reached discovery and my lawyer asked why I was included when she did not even know me. Her reply “because she commented”.
I wanted to sue her, but she could not even pay her lawyer, so she ended up defending herself. The case was eventually dismissed.
My friend Lurvie de Blois, my constant companion and I confronted this lady in one of the community events and of course my friend who was more aggressive, asked her why she included me in that lawsuit when we do not even know who she is.
She finally admitted that it was Rosemer Enverga who put the documents together so I could be included.
And the beauty queen’s excuse for following, is being bipolar.******