When it comes to malapropism, karaoke, and just being fun, Pinoys are king. No wonder “it’s more fun in the Philippines,” the Department of Tourism declares, — copy or not.
Yes, call it whatever you want but Pinoys have always the knack for turning an otherwise situation to fun as well as the absurd; sometimes to the over kill (and that’s literally true as some “My Way” copycats had ended being shot to death). Then take the naming of things as deadly as firecrackers. They are given names that only Pinoy minds could imagine. From the bizarre to creepy to absurdity, firecrackers are baptized as if their godfathers (the dispenser of names) belong to the netherworld.
In expression of religious fanaticism, who could beat the Pinoy’s devotion to the Black Nazarene of Quiapo? Reports say that about nine million people followed the lifesize statute of the image along the streets of Manila for 22 hours in frenzied ecstasy. In number and in intensity of devotion, Pinoys win again hands down.
An equal faith-based fervor is echoed by the deafening beat of the Sinulog drums in Cebu in blind love and adoration of the same Jesus, this time the baby or the Sto. Nino. The grandeur and passion of these traditions seem to point to the people’s grasping on to hope and fulfillment of this hope no one else could give but the object of supplication done with orgasmic divine rapture while better achieved with physical pain.
Yes, even the suffering could be part of the revelry. I remember for instance the thinking among village folks saying that a barrio fiesta celebration would not be considered successful “kung walang gulo” and at times even a killing. It’s more fun in the Philippines.
Going back to the subject of firecracker names. Here’s Pinoy firecracker nomenclature 101 based on what I have gathered from various sources:
Pacquiao – named after Manny Pacquiao. It comes in the form of thick, black phosphorus sticks and is reportedly bigger and more powerful than the piccolo, another type of firecracker. Oops then, Goodbye Gloria – named after Gloria Macapagal Arroyo. Its packaging is emblazoned with the former President’s face, and is said to be able to shut off street lamps and shatter glass windows.
Not to be outdone, comes the Ampatuan – named after the Ampatuan clan, whose members have been accused of being behind the country’s worst election-related violence, the Maguindanao massacre. It is described as more powerful than pla-pla, a triangle-shaped firecracker.
There’s even one representing the youngest member of the current senate, the Trillanes – named after Senator Antonio Trillanes IV. It is a 16-inch long cylindrical explosive. And, wow, here’s Bin Laden – named after the late Osama bin Laden, leader of the terrorist group Al Qaeda. It is described as a powerful baby dynamite. And to welcome the new year are the Goodbye Philippines – a giant triangular firecracker which can reportedly shatter a wall; Goodbye Earth – a triangular firecracker that is triple the size of an ordinary five-star, and Goodbye Universe – a firecracker as large as a bucket of chicken sold at KFC.
All of the above are considered illegal but yes, they are sold openly and used wantonly despite all the warnings and scary tactics by various government agencies. Reports in the aftermath of the New Year’s celebration showed the number of casualties even went up this year. People know the risk, the danger; they feel these as the blood surge to a ‘leap of faith’ — bahala na basta masaya. It’s really more fun in the Philippines.
Goodbye Universe, welcome 2012; what a paradox. Notwithstanding, this year, I have my plans set to re-visit the Philippines. I look forward to taking the RORO from Manila, to Visayas, to Mindanao. And if time would allow take the PNR from Manila to Bicol. I also plan to re-visit Jolo, Cagayan de Tawi-tawi, Batanes, Sarangani, and to the most dangerous nook and cranny of the archipelago as truly there’s really more fun in the Philippines.
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